Monday, September 30, 2013

The Holy Grocery Bill

I have had my fill
Of the Holy Grocery Bill
That God left behind
For us cavemen to find
Inconsistent rules for life
Designed for misery and strife

Where’s the Commandment against rape?
That would separate us from apes
It isn’t there, anywhere
Where’s the fatwah against acid attacks
From a man trying to get back?
It isn’t there, anywhere
Where’s the mizvot against herpes
Given by circumcision slurpees?
It isn’t there, anywhere
Where's the sutra against pillage
Of another cult's  village?
It isn't there anywhere

Why listen to your conscience
When you can kill and rape like God says
I think there’s no doubt about it
We’d be better off without it

But the Holy Grocery Bill’s text
Is just a reflection of our illness
We’d realize we didn’t need it
If only we didn’t feed it
There’s some good items in there too
That are read by far too few
If we fanned the flames of this light
We’d better judge what is right
And see the darkness in our hearts
Is what’s keeping us apart

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